How to Ruin Lunch & Make Your Dog Drool

Ughhh.

I am posting this little story to serve as a warning for any future culinary delusions that I may have.

I wanted to be a smarty pants and create a yummy, yet healthy, version of a Taco Bell Mexican Pizza. Please, Future Honey, remember that the only reason fast food tastes good is because it is prepared with ingredients that you refuse to admit exist. Using anything else other than those ingredients leads only to low self esteem and heartburn.

I would write out this unfortunate recipe that was supposed to result in a cookbook, a restaurant and then my own show, but I am trying very hard not to let lunch revist me. I need a serious tummy medicine.

Poor Jane wanted a sample (she thought I might have been overreacting), but alas, the mexican pizza contained spicy chili and I was not in the mood to create a recipe for peanut butter doggy truffles filled with milk of magnesia.

So here is your one and only warning Future Honey. You are no match for the culinary minds of fast food restaurants. Stick to something easy. Like Indian food or souffles.